Why marry?

It's not often that you find yourself married to a woman whom you are supposed to love and take care for the rest of your life. It normally happens once in our lifetimes and for some, more than once :-). For the later someone famously quipped that remarriage is the victory of hope over experience :-).

Coming back to my first line, I always questioned the logic behind it. If love is such a great thing, why should it be limited with one person or for that matter why should it be tied with anything at all?

Jokes apart, all married guys must have had the experience of facing an unavoidable question and an inescapable situation called marriage. I am no exception and was given lot of reasons as to why I should marry. I like to list some of them.

You have someone who cooks and takes care of you and the home.
You have someone to talk to.
You have someone to share your responsibilities.
You have someone to satisfy your physical and emotional needs.
You have respect in society. (We all know what look a house owner would give you if you are single trying to rent a house or how police would behave with you when there is just you instead a woman at the rear of your vehicle.) But still I couldn't buy these arguments.

It is undeniable that a woman brings respect and good status to a man in society. In other words she completes him. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpWAlvWNZj0)and the man cares for her and provides security to her. But still the reasons I was given didn't satisfy me and was about to give up when suddenly out of nowhere something struck and I formulated a theory of my own as to why one should marry. This certainly is not the ultimate reason, but for me it made some sense. Give it a read and find out if it makes any sense at all.

Remember the last time when you felt good about possessing something. It could be any household item, an electronic gadget, a car or even a home of your own. When I think why the act of owning something made me feel good I think it's because it satisfies my ego.It makes me feel like I am the master and in-charge of it, something which I can claim to be my own. If that's in great demand, then it pampers my ego because of the knowledge that not many possess that thing. But in time that feeling fades and before you know it one is in search of something else or at-least trying to upgrade the existing one.

Now think of owning a robot which listens to all your commands (only programmed commands) and executes them. It doesn't complain or even ask you to take it out during the evenings either. One may feel ok with this help in his daily chores, but the underlying fact is it's still a robot.

Now think of your family and friends. This is an interesting part because in here, one feels like being owned rather than owning them. You listen to your parents (ideally :-) ), you learn to give because of your siblings, you share almost everything with your friends and these are the things that define you as a person and prepares you for the world. But only in marriage does one feel like he/she owns and at the same time being owned by his/her spouse. You do things for your spouse and you get some things in return from your spouse. It's a two way and that too a dynamic relationship that's constantly evolving. Unlike in fantasies there are no "Happily everafters" in marriage, but only constant and also consistent effort to work on one's marriage. Your imperfections may not be the critical factor in your relationship with your family & friends as they tend to overlook them. But in marriage they are the key. You have to find your way through these imperfections and this makes it challenging and hence interesting. What's life without challenges and marriage is a perfect tool to make it interesting.

In the movie "Bicentennial man" the robot character played by Robin williams proposes to his beloved and she turns him down for the obvious reasons. She says though he does everything for her, she can not marry him because he is too perfect and predictable. Perfection is not a human trait but imperfection is. Predictability results in boredom, whereas unpredictability spices up things in our lives. The situation and the context through which the scene unfolds before us is fantastic. Watch it to understand it better.

NOTE: Watch the below scene in "Shall we dance" where Susan sarandon wonderfully says why one needs marriage.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbsBV9v3TRo&feature=player_detailpage